Monday, 5 November 2007

Day 23

We are going on Wednesday!

Juan's uncle will be arriving sometime on Tuesday, he is bringing some people with him, they will spend the night with us then when we head south they will go their separate ways.

That gives me some more time to fill you in on what happened in New York. Juan says that they were trying to intimidate me when they pulled on the gloves in an aggressive manner. If that was the case it didn't work! How could I be more intimidated? I didn't know he was threatening to look inside my bottom! I was in a foreign country, in a small room, with two bullies, bleeding from my swollen lip and nearly naked with my dignity snatched from me! I was only there to save the boys from the RSbandits but I couldn't tell them that and put more people in danger.

The man wearing the latex gloves, when realising they weren't having any effect on me, took them off and threw them in the litter bin. He then gave me a plastic pot, took me back to my cell and told me I was going nowhere until my bowels were empty and the tub was full. I think by that he meant I had to poo in it, disgusting!

Well if that's what it was going to take to get out of there then so be it I thought to myself. Only problem was because I really wanted to go I couldn't if you get my drift! And did they really think the would find drugs in my faeces? I had an inhaler for my asthma, did they think I was going to poke that up my bottom? Why would I? I was very confused!

After about three hours I got the urge and filled the pot, how humiliating! To compound my humiliation as soon as I had finished someone came and took the pot away so they must have been watching me do it. Now they were going to hunt through my poo for my inhaler which was in my luggage, madness!

It was nearly midnight when they came back. They gave me my clothes and luggage and told me they weren't pressing charges. I asked if they found any drugs and was told not to push my luck. They gave me back the artifacts but told me I had to pay an import charge. This was more than the cost of the whole stock, Juan wouldn't be happy! He would also be unhappy as one of the treasured 'Black Double Dong Squirters' was missing and I wasn't asking for it back.

The two bullies escorted me to my connecting flight and waited with me until I got on it. They didn't apologise or wave good-bye.


DJ Kirkby said...

Lucky escape for you! I am sure Juan wont care about the additional charges seeing as you probably paid for them all. Are you going to ask for that money back as a business expense or something?

Christian said...

DJ; Juan has promised to pay me back everything he has borrowed and I know he will!